if(message.content.startsWith(`<@!${client.user.id}> help`)||message.content.startsWith(`<@!${client.user.id}>help`))returnmessage.channel.send(`My prefix is \`${config.prefix}\`, type ${config.prefix}help for help.`);
.setDescription(`Kneel down, mortals, for the command list, signed by Obama himself.\nEvery command starts with the prefix '**${config.prefix}**', for example ${config.prefix}help.`)
.addField('-obamium','Send a Obamid in all its beauty')
.addField('-vbucks','Totally working V-Bucks generator')
.addField('-copypasta','oh shit oh fuck')
.addField('-karma','Shows your karma and coins on this server')
.setDescription('If you are a r/rgbroachgang member, you can get acces to a secret rgbroachgang channel! I need to vibe check your reddit and Discord account first. You need to link a reddit account to your Discord account, and then [click here](https://obamium-subreddit.herokuapp.com/) to start the vibe check.');
message.channel.send(vibecheckembed);
break;
case'truefan':
if(checkMod())return;
lettarget=message.mentions.members.first();
letroleid='718862546395988078';
letrole=message.guild.roles.cache.get(roleid);
letcid='718908301555007518';
letchannel=message.guild.channels.cache.get(cid);
if(!role)returnmessage.channel.send('Error: Could not find role');
if(!channel)returnmessage.channel.send('Error: Could not find channel');
if(!target)returnmessage.channel.send('You need to @mention someone for this to work!');
if(target.user.bot)returnmessage.channel.send('You can\'t do this with bots.');
if(!target.roles.cache.has(roleid)){
// Give the role
target.roles.add(role);
channel.send(`${target.user} is now able to access this channel.`);
letmsg=newDiscord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Congratulations!')
.setDescription(`The r/Obamium Discord Staff has decided to give you access to a secret text channel: <#${cid}>`)
message.channel.send('**AITA For Dropkicking an Toddler off a cliff because he used my Dead Name**',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The title speaks for itself. So me (20F transitioning) was going on a hike with my cousin and his parents.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('There’s this really large cliff that looms over my house. I recently told my family I was trans.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I thought my toddler cousin had realize me new name is Jenny. Instead he said Max.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I instantly flew into a mentally unstable rage and my eyes turned red. I began to drool and have a mini-seizure.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I ran toward my cousin at the speed of light. I picked him up by the back of his shirt.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('His parents ran toward him but with my tranny-powers I managed to use my telekineses and freeze them in mid-air.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I threw my toddler cousin up in the air and using my tranny in the 40% powers kicked him at the speed of light.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('He went fucking flying and I heard his little screams which made my gaping hole which used to be my dick until I forcefully castrated myself began to drip with precum.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I saw him fall to the ground and splatter by then I was so horny I came all over the place.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You sit on the toilet to jack off, but you begin to cum uncontrollably.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('After ten spurts you start to worry. Your hand is sticky and it reeks of semen.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You desperately shove your dick into a wad of toilet paper, but that only makes your balls hurt.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The cum accelerates. It’s been three minutes. You can’t stop cumming.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Your bathroom floor is covered in a thin layer of baby fluid. You try to cum into the shower drain but it builds up too fast.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You try the toilet. The cum is too thick to be flushed. You lock the bathroom door to prevent the cum from escaping.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The air grows hot and humid from the cum. The cum accelerates. You slip and fall in your own sperm.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The cum is now six inches deep, almost as long as your still-erect semen hose. Sprawled on your back, you begin to cum all over the ceiling.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Globs of the sticky white fluid begin to fall like raindrops, giving you a facial with your own cum. The cum accelerates.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You struggle to stand as the force of the cum begins to propel you backwards as if you were on a bukkake themed slip-and-slide.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Still on your knees, the cum is now at chin height. To avoid drowning you open the bathroom door.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The deluge of man juice reminds you of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919, only with cum instead of molasses.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The cum accelerates. It’s been two hours. Your children and wife scream in terror as their bodies are engulfed by the snow-white sludge.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Your youngest child goes under, with viscous bubbles and muffled cries rising from the goop. You plead to God to end your suffering. The cum accelerates.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You squeeze your dick to stop the cum, but it begins to leak out of your asshole instead. You let go.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The force of the cum tears your urethra open, leaving only a gaping hole in your crotch that spews semen.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Your body picks up speed as it slides backwards along the cum. You smash through the wall, hurtling into the sky at thirty miles an hour.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('From a bird’s eye view you see your house is completely white. Your neighbor calls the cops. The cum accelerates.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('As you continue to ascend, you spot police cars racing towards your house.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The cops pull out their guns and take aim, but stray loads of cum hit them in the eyes, blinding them. The cum accelerates.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You are now at an altitude of 1000 feet. The SWAT team arrives. Military helicopters circle you. Hundreds of bullets pierce your body at once, yet you stay conscious.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Your testicles have now grown into a substitute brain. The cum accelerates. It has been two days. With your body now destroyed, the cum begins to spray in all directions.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You break the sound barrier. The government deploys fighter jets to chase you down, but the impact of your cum sends one plane crashing to the ground.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The government decides to let you leave the earth. You feel your gonads start to burn up as you reach the edges of the atmosphere.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You narrowly miss the ISS, giving it a new white paint job as you fly past. Physicists struggle to calculate your erratic trajectory.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The cum accelerates. The cum begins to gravitate towards itself, forming a comet trail of semen. Astronomers begin calling you the “Cummet.”',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You are stuck in space forever, stripped of your body and senses, forced to endure an eternity of cumshots. Eventually, you stop thinking.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch?',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('Now, hypothetically speaking, if this did happen, I mean, you must remember that all physical matter has a very thin layer of atoms surrounding it, so technically, you are never truly',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('touching anything or anyone, but instead, the atoms surrounding your body and this object or person are coming into contact with one another.',{tts:true});
message.channel.send('So, once again, hypothetically speaking, if I were to attempt to have sex with your mom, I would fail miserably, because, according to science, our bodies would never come into contact',{tts:true});
message.channel.send(' with one another.',{tts:true});
