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obama-bot/index.js

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Initial commit
2020-07-17 16:08:27 +00:00
const Discord = require('discord.js');
const client = new Discord.Client({partials: ["REACTION", "MESSAGE"]});
const config = require('./config.json');
const Enmap = require('enmap');
client.login(config.token);
const karma = new Enmap({name: "karma"});
const coins = new Enmap({name: "coins"});
module.exports.karma = karma;
module.exports.coins = coins;
module.exports.client = client;
const witmodule = require('./wit');
function random(low, high) {
low = Math.ceil(low);
high = Math.floor(high);
high = high + 1;
rndm = Math.random();
return Math.floor(rndm * (high - low) + low);
}
client.once('ready', () => {
console.log('Logged in as ' + client.user.username);
client.user.setActivity(`hamborger`, {type: "STREAMING", url: "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHwvUFjaNdU"});
require('./karma'); // Start the karma thingy
});
client.on('guildCreate', g => {
if (g.id != '653568812578373643') {
g.leave();
}
})
let allowEval = false;
client.on('message', message => {
addToDatabase(message.author.id);
function checkMod(silent) {
if (!message.member.permissions.has('ADMINISTRATOR')) {
let erEmbed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('You are not allowed to use this.')
.setDescription('Only the mod team can use this command.')
.setImage('https://media1.tenor.com/images/1056e92668594b262d3338c897ce9bd3/tenor.gif?itemid=7706023');
if (silent !== true) message.channel.send(erEmbed);
return true;
}
return false;
}
try {
if (message.author.bot) return;
if (!message.guild) return message.channel.send('You can only use me on the r/Obamium Discord right now.');
if (message.guild.id != '653568812578373643') message.guild.leave();
console.log(`Message by ${message.author.username}: ${message.content}`);
witmodule.execute(message);
// 69 nice haha le funny number
if (message.content.toLowerCase().indexOf('69') > -1) {
let replies = [
'You said the funny number nice',
'Haha funny 69',
'You did a funny right here:\n> 69',
'lmao funny number',
'69 is funny haha',
'you have achieved comedy by saying 69',
'https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fi.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F016%2F588%2Fsixtynine.jpg&f=1&nofb=1',
'Obama signed that your funny lmao',
'haha funny sex number',
'sex',
'69 nice'
];
let curIndex = 0;
let continueSearch = true;
let found = [];
while (continueSearch) {
if (message.content.toLowerCase().indexOf('69', curIndex) == -1) {
continueSearch = false;
break;
}
let f = message.content.toLowerCase().indexOf('69', curIndex);
curIndex = f + 1;
found.push(f);
}
delete continueSearch;
delete curIndex;
let send = false;
found.forEach(index => {
let charL = message.content.charAt(index - 1);
let charR = message.content.charAt(index + 2);
if ((isNaN(charL) || charL == '' || charL == ' ') && (isNaN(charR) || charR == '' || charR == ' ')) send = true;
});
if (send) message.channel.send(replies[random(0, replies.length - 1)]);
}
// Actual command stuff
if (message.content.startsWith(`<@!${client.user.id}> help`) || message.content.startsWith(`<@!${client.user.id}>help`)) return message.channel.send(`My prefix is \`${config.prefix}\`, type ${config.prefix}help for help.`);
if (!message.content.startsWith(config.prefix)) return;
const args = message.content.slice(config.prefix.length).split(' ');
const command = args.shift().toLowerCase();
switch(command) {
case 'help':
let owner = client.users.cache.get('284323826165350400');
let embed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Commands')
.addField('­', '**----- Public commands -----**')
.setDescription(`Kneel down, mortals, for the command list, signed by Obama himself.\nEvery command starts with the prefix '**${config.prefix}**', for example ${config.prefix}help.`)
.addField('-obamium', 'Send a Obamid in all its beauty')
.addField('-vbucks', 'Totally working V-Bucks generator')
.addField('-copypasta', 'oh shit oh fuck')
.addField('-karma', 'Shows your karma and coins on this server')
.addField('-topkarma', 'Shows the users with the highest karma!')
.addField('-ping', 'Shows the bot\'s latency')
.addField('-brother', 'RGBRoachGang brothers, use this command to get access to a special channel!')
.addField('­', '**----- Admin commands -----**')
.addField('-truefan @Member', 'Give someone access to the top secret text channel™️')
.addField('-coins @Member [give/set] [value]', 'Manage the coins of an user')
.setFooter(`© Obamium Research | Developed by ${owner.username}#${owner.discriminator}`, 'https://cdn.discordapp.com/emojis/716021350883393566.gif')
.setColor('9c6341');
message.channel.send(embed);
break;
case 'obama':
case 'obamid':
case 'obamium':
let msg = '';
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208135213087').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208281882666').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208936325141').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208332345366').toString();
msg += '\n';
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208269168812').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208432746537').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208491597924').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208357249044').toString();
msg += '\n';
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208361574421').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208134950963').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208290140172').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208374026332').toString();
msg += '\n';
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208378220666').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208319500310').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208898445402').toString();
msg += message.guild.emojis.cache.get('715931208550318170').toString();
message.channel.send(msg);
break;
case 'vbuck':
case 'vbucks':
message.delete();
let embed2 = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setAuthor('Free Vbucks 100% legit no virus', 'https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscordemoji.com%2Fassets%2Femoji%2FVBuck.png&f=1&nofb=1')
.setDescription('Click here to download free Vbucks: [https://vbuck-free-generator.com](https://bit.ly/freevbucks2020legitworking)')
.setColor('88ccdb');
message.channel.send(embed2);
break;
case 'amitheowner':
if (message.author.id == '284323826165350400') {
message.channel.send(`Yes, ${message.author}, you definitely are my owner.`)
} else {
message.channel.send(`No, ${message.author}, you are not my owner.`)
}
break;
case 'ping':
let pingEmbed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Pong?')
.setDescription('Measuring...')
.setColor('#2F62CA');
message.channel.send(pingEmbed).then(msg => {
pingEmbed.setTitle('Pong!');
pingEmbed.description = undefined;
pingEmbed.addField(':speech_balloon: Message delay', `\`${msg.createdTimestamp - message.createdTimestamp}ms\``, true);
pingEmbed.addField(':robot: Bot Ping', `\`${Date.now() - message.createdTimestamp}ms\``, true);
msg.edit(pingEmbed);
});
break;
case 'brother':
let vibecheckembed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Are you a brother?')
.setDescription('If you are a r/rgbroachgang member, you can get acces to a secret rgbroachgang channel! I need to vibe check your reddit and Discord account first. You need to link a reddit account to your Discord account, and then [click here](https://obamium-subreddit.herokuapp.com/) to start the vibe check.');
message.channel.send(vibecheckembed);
break;
case 'truefan':
if (checkMod()) return;
let target = message.mentions.members.first();
let roleid = '718862546395988078';
let role = message.guild.roles.cache.get(roleid);
let cid = '718908301555007518';
let channel = message.guild.channels.cache.get(cid);
if (!role) return message.channel.send('Error: Could not find role');
if (!channel) return message.channel.send('Error: Could not find channel');
if (!target) return message.channel.send('You need to @mention someone for this to work!');
if (target.user.bot) return message.channel.send('You can\'t do this with bots.');
if (!target.roles.cache.has(roleid)) {
// Give the role
target.roles.add(role);
channel.send(`${target.user} is now able to access this channel.`);
let msg = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Congratulations!')
.setDescription(`The r/Obamium Discord Staff has decided to give you access to a secret text channel: <#${cid}>`)
.setThumbnail('https://discordemoji.com/assets/emoji/ClapClap.gif');
target.send(msg);
message.channel.send(`${target.user.username} is now a true obama fan.`);
} else {
// Take the role
target.roles.remove(role);
channel.send(`${target.user} is no longer able to access this channel.`);
message.channel.send(`${target.user.username} is no longer a true obama fan.`);
}
break;
case 'toggleeval':
if (message.author.id != '284323826165350400') return console.log('Toggle Eval attemped by unauthorized user: ' + message.author.id);
if (allowEval == true) allowEval = false; else allowEval = true;
message.channel.send('Toggled ' + (allowEval ? 'on' : 'off'));
break;
case 'eval':
if (message.author.id != '284323826165350400') return console.log('Eval attemped by unauthorized user: ' + message.author.id);
if (!allowEval) return message.channel.send('Eval is disabled.');
message.suppressEmbeds(true);
var res = eval(args.join(' '));
if (typeof res == 'object') res = JSON.stringify(res);
else if (typeof res == 'function') res = '`(Function)`';
else if (typeof res == 'undefined') res = '`undefined`';
if (res == "{}") return;
message.channel.send(res);
break;
case 'copypasta':
if (!args[0]) args[0] = '';
switch(args[0].toLowerCase()) {
case 'toddler':
message.channel.send('**AITA For Dropkicking an Toddler off a cliff because he used my Dead Name**', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The title speaks for itself. So me (20F transitioning) was going on a hike with my cousin and his parents.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('There’s this really large cliff that looms over my house. I recently told my family I was trans.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('I thought my toddler cousin had realize me new name is Jenny. Instead he said Max.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('I instantly flew into a mentally unstable rage and my eyes turned red. I began to drool and have a mini-seizure.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('I ran toward my cousin at the speed of light. I picked him up by the back of his shirt.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('His parents ran toward him but with my tranny-powers I managed to use my telekineses and freeze them in mid-air.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('I threw my toddler cousin up in the air and using my tranny in the 40% powers kicked him at the speed of light.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('He went fucking flying and I heard his little screams which made my gaping hole which used to be my dick until I forcefully castrated myself began to drip with precum.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('I saw him fall to the ground and splatter by then I was so horny I came all over the place.', {tts: true});
break;
case 'cum':
message.channel.send('**Infinite cum.**', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You sit on the toilet to jack off, but you begin to cum uncontrollably.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('After ten spurts you start to worry. Your hand is sticky and it reeks of semen.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You desperately shove your dick into a wad of toilet paper, but that only makes your balls hurt.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The cum accelerates. It’s been three minutes. You can’t stop cumming.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('Your bathroom floor is covered in a thin layer of baby fluid. You try to cum into the shower drain but it builds up too fast.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You try the toilet. The cum is too thick to be flushed. You lock the bathroom door to prevent the cum from escaping.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The air grows hot and humid from the cum. The cum accelerates. You slip and fall in your own sperm.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The cum is now six inches deep, almost as long as your still-erect semen hose. Sprawled on your back, you begin to cum all over the ceiling.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('Globs of the sticky white fluid begin to fall like raindrops, giving you a facial with your own cum. The cum accelerates.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You struggle to stand as the force of the cum begins to propel you backwards as if you were on a bukkake themed slip-and-slide.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('Still on your knees, the cum is now at chin height. To avoid drowning you open the bathroom door.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The deluge of man juice reminds you of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919, only with cum instead of molasses.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The cum accelerates. It’s been two hours. Your children and wife scream in terror as their bodies are engulfed by the snow-white sludge.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('Your youngest child goes under, with viscous bubbles and muffled cries rising from the goop. You plead to God to end your suffering. The cum accelerates.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You squeeze your dick to stop the cum, but it begins to leak out of your asshole instead. You let go.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The force of the cum tears your urethra open, leaving only a gaping hole in your crotch that spews semen.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('Your body picks up speed as it slides backwards along the cum. You smash through the wall, hurtling into the sky at thirty miles an hour.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('From a bird’s eye view you see your house is completely white. Your neighbor calls the cops. The cum accelerates.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('As you continue to ascend, you spot police cars racing towards your house.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The cops pull out their guns and take aim, but stray loads of cum hit them in the eyes, blinding them. The cum accelerates.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You are now at an altitude of 1000 feet. The SWAT team arrives. Military helicopters circle you. Hundreds of bullets pierce your body at once, yet you stay conscious.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('Your testicles have now grown into a substitute brain. The cum accelerates. It has been two days. With your body now destroyed, the cum begins to spray in all directions.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You break the sound barrier. The government deploys fighter jets to chase you down, but the impact of your cum sends one plane crashing to the ground.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The government decides to let you leave the earth. You feel your gonads start to burn up as you reach the edges of the atmosphere.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You narrowly miss the ISS, giving it a new white paint job as you fly past. Physicists struggle to calculate your erratic trajectory.', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('The cum accelerates. The cum begins to gravitate towards itself, forming a comet trail of semen. Astronomers begin calling you the “Cummet.”', {tts: true});
message.channel.send('You are stuck in space forever, stripped of your body and senses, forced to endure an eternity of cumshots. Eventually, you stop thinking.', {tts: true});
break;
default:
message.channel.send('Choose a copypasta:\n- toddler\n- cum');
break;
}
break;
case 'karma':
case 'coins':
case 'coin':
case 'gold':
const karmaID = '733339045463064607';
const coinsID = '733339908273602662';
const karmaEmote = message.guild.emojis.cache.get(karmaID).toString();
const coinsEmote = message.guild.emojis.cache.get(coinsID).toString();
let targetID = message.mentions.members.first() || message.author;
targetID = targetID.id;
let karmaembed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle(message.mentions.members.first() ? 'Balance of ' + message.mentions.members.first().user.username : 'Your balance')
.setDescription(`${karmaEmote} Karma: \`${karma.get(targetID) || '0'}\`\n${coinsEmote} Coins: \`${coins.get(targetID) || '0'}\``);
let kCount = karma.get(targetID);
if (kCount) {
if (kCount > 0) karmaembed.setColor('f36916');
if (kCount < 0) karmaembed.setColor('9494ff');
}
message.channel.send(karmaembed);
break;
case 'topkarma':
case 'top':
const karmaID1 = '733339045463064607';
const karmaEmote1 = message.guild.emojis.cache.get(karmaID1).toString();;
let karmaboard = [];
karma.keyArray().forEach(uid => {
karmaboard.push({id: uid, karma: karma.get(uid)});
});
karmaboard.sort((a, b) => a.karma - b.karma);
karmaboard.reverse();
let karmaboardembed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Karma Leaderboard')
.setDescription(karmaEmote1 + ' Karma leaderboard - Top 12 for ' + message.guild.name);
for (let x=0; x < 12; x += 1) {
if (!karmaboard[x]) break;
let u = message.guild.members.cache.get(karmaboard[x].id);
if (!u) karmaboardembed.addField(`${x+1}. [Unknown user]`, `${karmaEmote1} ${karmaboard[x].karma} Karma`, true); else karmaboardembed.addField(`${x+1}. ${u.user.username}#${u.user.discriminator} ${u.user.bot ? '(Bot)' : ''}`, `${karmaEmote1} ${karmaboard[x].karma} Karma`, true);
}
message.channel.send(karmaboardembed);
break;
case 'managecoins':
case 'setcoins':
case 'usercoins':
if (checkMod()) return;
let member = message.mentions.members.first();
if (!member) return message.channel.send('You need to @mention a member!')
if (!coins.get(member.id)) coins.set(member.id, 0);
let pass = false;
let amount = 0;
if (args[1] == 'set') {
if (isNaN(args[2])) return message.channel.send('You gotta put in a number!');
pass = true;
amount = args[2];
}
else if (args[1] == 'give' ||args[1] == 'add') {
if (isNaN(args[2])) return message.channel.send('You gotta put in a number!');
pass = true;
amount = coins.get(member.id) + Number(args[2]);
}
else if (isNaN(args[1])) return message.channel.send('You gotta put in a number!');
else {
pass = true;
amount = coins.get(member.id) + Number(args[1]);
}
if (!pass) return;
let old = coins.get(member.id);
let coinsSetEmbed = new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('Coins updated for '+ member.user.username)
.setDescription(`Coins set to ${amount} (Old amount: ${old})`)
.setColor('ddbd37');
message.channel.send(coinsSetEmbed)
.then(() => {
coins.set(member.id, amount);
});
break;
}
} catch (e) {
message.channel.send(new Discord.MessageEmbed()
.setTitle('An error has occurred.')
.setDescription(`\`\`\`js\n${e}\`\`\``)
.setColor('ff0000'));
console.error(e);
}
});
function addToDatabase(id) {
if (!id) return;
if (typeof karma.get(id) != 'number') karma.set(id, 0);
if (typeof coins.get(id) != 'number') coins.set(id, 0);
return;
}
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